Saturday, June 5, 2010

2:57 a.m.

"Wwwwaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh..................wwwwwwAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Crap...Kai's awake. Gosh, he was so good about sleeping through the night for so long, why is he waking up in the middle of the night, every night this week! I get up, stumbling in the dark, and rush to Kai's room. I try to give him his binky, hoping maybe he'll just go back to such luck, still crying. I go into the kitchen, block his eyes from the bright light of the fridge, while I grab a bottle. I turn on the hot water and start warming the milk. Rob comes in the kitchen to check on us, Kai has his eyes closed and is kind of tiredly half-heartedly crying (sounds very fake). I finally get the bottle to a decent temperature and take our routine spot on the recliner. I rock him as he sucks down his bottle very quickly. I'm hoping he'll easily go back to sleep. As he finishes, I do a switcheroo with the bottle for the binky. I pull him up onto my shoulder to burp him, and his head goes limp against my shoulder. As I am patting his back, I start to think of how sweet and innocent children are. I think of how Kai will be in 17, or so, years. These are the kind of moments I will think back on. When I could hold him in my arms and kiss his cheek softly. It makes me grateful that I have this moment with him. Just the two of us cuddling. I get a little burp out of him, so I gather him and his blanky up and walk softly to his room. I give him several more kisses on his cheek and whisper "I love you, bud" and in one swift move, lay him gently in his crib. He doesn't make a sound and I creep out of his room and softly close his door, my heart full. I love that little boy. I tip-toe back to my room, and crawl into bed. 3:11 a.m. Not bad... I gradually fall asleep again, thankful that my little boy woke me up to remind me how much I love him.